ok. i am ready to start the year now.

Now that it is almost February I'm ready to get going. With the good possibility of closing on a new home in the next week and moving out of our kind and generous friends' one bedroom 700 sq. Ft guest house, I'm beginning to feel hope again. My three year old hasn't vomited in over 3 weeks, the prescription meds are down from 16 in the household to 11, Savvie's chipped tooth is repaired for the second time, Clark has beaten the bacterial form of the mumps, I have lost almost 20 pounds and 2 pants sizes, I have attended the funeral of a dear Aunt, we finally had a snow day, church is at the early schedule, and I am surrounded by beautiful things. It has been a very interesting 4 months - I wish I could say I've sailed through with grace and style, but that would not be the truth. What I HAVE done is learned a few lessons which will better prepare me for what lies ahead. I've learned that if I'm willing to recognize it, God's hand is in EvErYthInG. I truly believe that. Sometimes its a helping hand, a healing hand, a lifting hand, a stayed hand, a strong hand, a carrying hand, even a waiting hand, but its always there.

This year, I am going to learn how to fly. I think if I can learn how to fly above my daily life I will be able to look down on it and see that the even the mundane is meaningful, that the Lord's hand is there, and that I can rise above challenges that threaten to pin me down.
I am going to figure out what flying means to me. I am writing it down, allowing it to change me. I am going to take my beaten down, depressed, frustrated, impatient, loud self and make something new with myself.
'For I am not as yet come to the rest and to the inheritance, which the Lord my God giveth me.'
Deuteronomy 12:9
Until I come to that rest I am going to restore myself to the me that flies, I don't want to do anymore climbing; only flying. I want to fly through stormy skies and even battlefields with a peaceful heart.
Wish me luck. I don't know how to fly yet and I need to go find my wings....
Come fly with me.

'(Fly) in the light of your fire and in the sparks which ye have kindled.'
2 Nephi 7:11

Xo,
E
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Comments

  1. ckmJanuary 26, 2011 at 7:18 AM

    I will sail, run, walk or fly with you. Thank you for the beautiful reminders that we are not alone. I love the idea of flying. It made me think of this song ... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hl_TCt9wtNE&feature=related

    I think I need to find my wings too ... Hugs

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  2. UnknownJanuary 26, 2011 at 8:23 AM

    Once again - I love you and your strength. Even these past couple months when you may have not felt strong - I have felt it. I too and restoring and becoming the daughter my Heavenly Father intends for me to be and learning to be strong (even if being strong sometimes means accepting the fact that we are weak) I love you em and I am totally serious about womens conference. Let's figure out if it is doable. Let's meet there and enjoy 2 days of being completely lifted up and spiritually fed. Off to LA i go - have a great week my friend !!!

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  3. AnonymousJanuary 26, 2011 at 8:24 AM

    Em-These are amazing, inspiring thoughts. You also wrote them so beautifully. The verse from Deut. is magnificent and I love this

    "I've learned that if I'm willing to recognize it, God's hand is in EvErYthInG. I truly believe that. Sometimes its a helping hand, a healing hand, a lifting hand, a stayed hand, a strong hand, a carrying hand, even a waiting hand, but its always there."
    Thanks for who you are, I love you!

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  4. krisJanuary 26, 2011 at 8:26 AM

    I really liked this post- you are amazing!

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  5. JocelynJanuary 26, 2011 at 9:12 AM

    Profound and inspiring. Gosh, the day to day would really be more fulfilling if I could learn to fly over it and see with a new perspective how it is getting me to my end goal.

    Love your collage at the top--- just perfect.

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  6. SuzyJanuary 26, 2011 at 2:41 PM

    Amazing Emily. Can't wait to see what 2011 holds in store for you. It was great to visit with you and your family. I realize how many awesome relatives Mark has and wish there were more opportunities to hang out. Good luck learning to fly!! BTW, Mark and I both have blogs. Send me your email and you can follow us too. :-)

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  7. millerjkJanuary 26, 2011 at 11:36 PM

    That was a beautiful post...I appreciate the analogy of flying.
    So happy that things are settling and working out for you, Kurt, and your family.
    Hoping 2011 is a happy year for the Smith family!

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  8. ShaleeJanuary 27, 2011 at 4:04 PM

    I love this. You are awesome. And so creative- I love the frame you made!!

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  9. ChristineJanuary 27, 2011 at 4:06 PM

    I'm saddened to hear all that you've gone through but am so happy that you are rising above it and learning to fly. I love your outlook.

    Your collage is beautiful and will be a wonderful reminder for you to learn to soar!!! I finished my art journal cover from BGC with a picture of me with the butterfly wings much like you did in your collage.

    She did it anyway,
    Christine

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