Monday, July 23, 2012

Light No. 29

This summer is passing much too quickly.  I'm dreading back to school so for now I am still in denial that it is coming in just three weeks after we get back from our upcoming trip to Utah.

So much needs to happen before we can even be close to leaving... and it all needs to happen in the next two days.  Kurt will see the specialist and go from a cast to a brace,  the van will get the transmission rebuilt again, we will pick up a check from the insurance company for Kurt's crashed van and shop for a new {to us} vehicle for him.  This whole vehicle business has been stressful and Kurt and I are both running pretty ragged this week.  Because of all the fires and hail here in Colorado it has taken 3 weeks for the insurance to process our claim and get everything sorted out.  In the mean time, they were only willing to get us a rental car for 6 days.  So I'm back to being stuck at home {which can be a very good thing} but now that the van is back into the shop we are out BOTH vehicles.  Not very doable when you are trying to work and run a family.  I wouldn't recommend it!  I keep telling Kurt {and myself} that in the end of all of this it will work out great, we will end up with a better vehicle for him and it will all be ok.  It's just getting to that part that worries me sometimes.

I had an interesting experience with a borrowed car breaking down on me in the middle of daytime traffic and 100 degree weather this week.  I have learned two things:
1.  Don't ever honk, yell and swear at someone who is broken down in front of you in the middle of traffic.  Understand that they don't want to be there every bit as badly as you don't want them there.  Try to be compassionate.
2.  I knew that everything was going to be ok the minute my Dad said he was on his way to help me.  This is a two part lesson - firstly it made me think of my Heavenly Father and how everything will be ok if I trust Him and allow Him to rescue me as well.  Also, It made me reflect on how I want my children to think of me.  Will they have the confidence and trust to know they can call me with their challenges and struggles and that I will be able to assist them in the ways that they need me without being emotional, dramatic, and losing my head?
My Dad didn't have the time to spend nearly three hours helping me in the middle of his work day.  He did it anyway.  He came because he loves me and he knew that my husband was busy, injured, and trying to do everything he could to take care of our family.  It was a profound lesson in love.  It's easy to show love when it's convenient, when we have time to plan and prepare and we are well rested and the situation is just right.  It is an even deeper manifestation when we are called up on times that are inconvenient and taxing.  Thanks, Dad, really, you continue to amaze me.  I love you!

I'm not going to say there were not at least three different times this weak when tears threatened at the corners of my eyes.  But I said to myself "Keep it together Man" {If you love Monsters Inc. you can relate to me here} and kept moving.  I feel the light shining.  My children are adorable and amazingly resiliant:  they don't complain about all the stuff and it's amazing how fast they forget it.

It's late, I'm tired.  I'm still here, I'm sailing on.


  1. I love you Em! I am trying to avoid my day...your post uplifted me. I am going to get off my computer now and get back to work cleaning my skunky least trying to. has been a day and half since the dog got sprayed and promptly ran into the house. the smell is a bit least my house will be cleaner then it has EVER been by the time i am done. xo

  2. I am telling myself to "keep it together Man" just from reading your post. Kurt was always the one I called on in emergency situations before I got married. He always came to my rescue. (I know my dad would have too but he lived across the country.) I'm praying for you guys. I hope you find a car. You could check classifieds and see if you can find something in Utah. Not that you want to add that to your list of things to do on vacation and drive two cars home but if you're interested, that's the best classified site here.