Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Reclaiming Myself

Happy New YEar! Wham, here it goes. A very long post. Feel free to run away now if you need to. This is more for me than anyone (we already knew that though) but here goes.
Happy new year!

Although my home looks like this

And this

I NEEDED some time to reclaim myself. I feel much better, and I am on a bit of a roll. Not sure if that is a good or bad thing but I'm not sleeping much or very well on account of all the wild ideas swimming around up there. ah. if only I had the time to execute all that I dream up!

just some cards

I love how my Christmas card display turned out this year. It has been fun to flip through!
This blanket is a bit on the wild side but I like how it turned out and I hope that baby Olivia likes it as well! It has been needing some love to get it finished for a while now so I am so happy to have been able to do it!

AND while i was crafting Christian did some crafting of his own, which he is so very proud of and it stands outside his door! There has been a lot of hammering going on in the basement!

oh. AND I wanted to share my current favorite recipe. I find myself making this delicious (and easy) dish over and over. My children eat it, we have leftovers that are great for tacos, sandwiches, or just plain eating, and it has great flavor! I hope you enjoy it as much as we have!
Pulled Pork

First you mix up this rub and rub it into the rinsed pork roast. ( When I make up this I usually have enough to use it 3 or so times: use about 3TBS to rub on) Keep your mixture for up to 6 months in an airtight container.

2 TBS paprika
1 TBS groung red pepper
1 TBS kosher salt
1 tsp. freshly ground black pepper
1 tsp. powdered garlic
1 tsp. powdered onion
1 TBS chili powder
1 tsp. thyme
1 tsp. oregano
Place in crockpot with 4-6 cups of apple cider (depending on the size of your roast) , 3-6 fresh rosemary sprigs and 2 sliced jalapeno peppers. lay the peppers across the top of the meat. I also use dehydrated jalapeno peppers and that works well too. You may want to pull the peppers off before serving, but so much of the 'hotness' cooks out of them that our family likes to mix them in and eat it all together!

I know it seems ludicrous to others - spending time slicing paper in crisp lines, sewing and watching the beautiful stitches punch through that pretty fabric, gluing buttons, flowers, and occasionally my fingers to more pretty paper, thumbing through endless photos, and in general stacking up countless craft items to be put away 'when I'm finished' on all areas of my work desk - all of this takes me back. Return to me. Reminds me that to create something fills up my spirit, reawakens my soul, allows me to breathe deeply again. Only now can I resolutely look ahead to getting the children back to school (preferably on time!), dentist appointments, piano, dance, karate, homework, reading logs (this I have noticed makes reading much less enjoyable!) you get the picture.... REAL LIFE!!!

I am happy that it is a new year. The past few years have been very painful. I still feel a lot of pain. I'm making my way through it. This year I am doing just ONE thing, every day, to make myself better. And by that I mean baby steps. Nothing huge, no big list to post here, just some heartfelt notes in my journals to remind me I need to practice becoming more of myself than I have been these past few years. A lot of me has been hidden under the pain. But I'm still here. This year I will be doing a lot of digging!
and lastly, I was scrapbooking and found this beautilful piece by Melody Ross and I LOVE it so much!

This year I am going to PRACTICE, every day, listening for what I need to hear. Maybe if you listen you will hear too! Happy New Year ~ may we all be better listeners!
Emily Laurel - still sailing on

Friday, December 25, 2009

A very MERRY Christmas to all!

These past weeks have been filled with wonderful holiday activities, school parties, carriage rides, a piano recital, and my favorite: reading christmas stories around the tree with the family each night. We have truly experienced "advent" in the traditional meaning: to prepare ourselves to receive Christ into our hearts on Christmas day. It has been a wonderful month and I feel happy with what I did, and that is was ok to let go of all that I did not get to.

This year we burned a collection of our favorite christmas songs and shared it with friends close by. It was fun to have our friends enjoy some of the music that we love so much! We carried on our tradition of all the kids sleeping under the tree and started a few new traditions too.

I feel so blessed today. It has been perfect. Last night our family (who live in CO) were able to come over and we shared a wonderful evening of acting out the nativity and spending some time together. The kids got to bed at a decent time and all went as planned for the rest of the night!

This morning I have LOVED watching my children enjoy their gifts and smile and laugh. My favorite thing is hearing their prayers today ....
"thank you for Jesus being born so that we could celebrate this wonderful day. Thank you that Jesus is our best present ever but that we can still have fun presents and remember him. "

They have all been so sweet in reminding each other the reason for all of this fun. It makes me happy to overhear them telling each other such sweet things.

We have loved spending the day together playing and staying in our pajamas until after lunch time!

OH and last but NOT least - my new computer arrived! MERRY CHRISTMAS to me! I am so thankful for this ! I should be able to stay online from now on without multiple crashes per month! YEA!!!

Has everything REALLY been perfect? NO. But its been a perfectly imperfect mess for me, just the way I like it.

May your holidays be as wonderful as ours. May you be thankful that Jesus was born so we can have all of this fun!